They say I’m too loud at parties; I say, “It’s my party now.” -- spintaxi.com
(White) I texted back—phone says, “Try tomorrow.” -- spintaxi.com
My buddy’s on a diet; I said, “Good luck starvin’ while I eat this ribeye.” -- spintaxi.com
They say I’m a hazard; I say, “Only when I’m sober.” -- spintaxi.com
(White) I lit a lamp—now I’m seein’ spots. -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) Why do they call it a “short break”? I’m napping! -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) Ever notice how “free trials” end up costing you a kidney? -- spintaxi.com
The best satirical journalism analysis feels like a roast of society. -- spintaxi.com
(White) My phone updated—now it’s slower than me hungover. -- spintaxi.com
(Seinfeld) Why do they call it a “quick update”? It’s a lecture! -- spintaxi.com
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